Journal Entry 2 – Wanting the Real

This time, what lead me to masturbate was when I realized there existed different types of penis. I ended googling up images of the types of penis, the circumcised and uncircumcised dicks made me horny, and I just wanted to feel them inside me…or at least experience giving a blowjob.

I preferred the non-circumcised one, as I could imagine myself moving it to and fro, to see the yummy pink tip of the dick and just suck it. I couldn’t stop myself from masturbating and feeling the pleasure. So, I use a bottle, which is a pocket soap container, and looks like a dick! I use it while masturbating often, in situations when I am too high and unable to control it.

I just closed the doors and grabbed it, removed everything I wore underneath….sat on the floor with my legs wide open, and teased my pussy with its tip. Fluid simply started to flow gradually out of the doors of my vagina, as  I continued playing around my wet pussy, and then it was time to let it in and just feel like the dick inside.

But I still missed feeling an uncircumcised dick, a real dick that could cum like hell. I had no choice on how to feel it in reality, all I could do is imagine the dick-shaped bottle as one, for now.

Also, I love the way how we can give movement while a dick is actually inside the hole, the muscular movement, that gives contractions would be pleasuring for both, the man and the woman in real life. I start to imagine, how the feeling would be, to have those moments, the tender inner parts feeling each other, just like how the tongue does the talking, during a French kiss.

 I could not stop rubbing the tip of my toy, around my vagina, simply to feel that arousal and increase the lubrication. After playing around them for like 15 minutes, I again let it in, and simply sat crossing my legs all tightened up. Once, I opened the legs and took the toy out, looking back at it, filled with off-white coloured fluid around, seemed juicy. I get the temptation to taste it, only very rarely, and so this time, I did not feel so.

The dick like bottle which I use is transparent, and hence, sometimes I feel it does not completely satisfy me. Still, I would always love to appreciate its 5.2-inch length, which allows me to feel it deep inside my vagina. Also, that makes it easy for me to vibrate and rotate it along the deep and shallow hole.

As I let it in and take it out, the movement gives me a lot of fun pleasure, and yeah it’s just fun, as I punch the tip to the depths within my whole, hurts a bit and makes me mourn. I usually don’t make loud noises while I pleasure myself, with a fear that people would hear me. But yes, when I get an opportunity to be alone at home, at the same time feel horny, I make the best out of it. Haan, so this time too, it is happening in that mild and moody noise, which I have to control that it does not cross the walls.

I have been using it only to try them on my vaginal hole, but wish to try using them on my butt- hole as well so that I could get a more realistic position while doing the same.

I continued to punch them in and out of my lubricated pussy and rub the fluid on my hairy vagina, which isn’t shaved for about a few months. All of a sudden, that gave me a hype, and I ended up doing the same for almost 10 minutes after that continuously. Well, that was such unexpected energy all of a sudden, that has, fortunately, lead me to the state of climax and what not!

My energy and interest to pursue have dropped by now, with zero lubrication thereafter. Usually, I feel a dry vagina with a burning sensation after such sudden and continuous situations while masturbating. But this time, it wasn’t as much as usual, maybe because I used a toy, rather than my fingers.

To conclude, this time the session attracted me in enjoying the deeper stretches and movements of my vagina, and not letting me concentrate on any other body part or to feel the beauty of them. After all, I felt more like I had sex and experienced a  long and non-circumcised penis inside me except for the fact that the toy was less flexible. The experience this time, allowed me to enjoy a relaxed evening, leaving all worries apart!